“Perfect love casts out all fear”, we must have heard that a thousand times but I want to talk about something different, something about relationship and not spiritual. Have you been scared of being in a relationship before? The fear of having one woman or wife? These chills usually happen to players when they finally want to settle for one woman to marry. It comes from a myriad of decisions that need to be taken, and that needs to be taken carefully to avoid woes when one wants to marry.
Like 1 John 4:18 says, perfect love casts out fears. There is nothing to fear or worry about when marrying, especially when you have the right counsellors around you. Assuming I am one, I would advise you on what to do.
You just have to take it as “this is one of the many decisions I have to take”. Marriage is one of the stages in life, aside education and puberty, which we have to graduate to. Otherwise when choosing a partner, we could choose anybody but this is not always so. In spite of the time and effort people put into choosing the right partner, some still end up breaking up or divorcing. Why? It tells me that there is nothing to fear in marrying or choosing a marriage partner, we just have to make our minds right about what love is.
When we love our partner, there is nothing to worry about. Perfect love casts out fear, and fear is not made perfect in love. That means when we love our partners, it takes away any fear(s) we may have or may be harbouring. Seriously, when you love someone, there is nothing to worry about because – your – love takes care of it all. Like they say, love is blind to all the spots that’s in (or on?) a person. The spots start to show or starts showing when we’re falling out of love. Like I say, it takes the love of God to see all the spots and wrinkles and blemishes on a person and still be able to love the person like you should. Other than that, love bears all things (1 Corinthians 13:7a). If you claim you love your partner and you can’t bear with him or her, then you do not know love.
As they say, there is no such thing as ‘perfect partner’. To find that perfect partner, you have to love first relentlessly, like unconditionally. He that fears is not perfect in love. When you love, there should be nothing holding you back, and nothing causing you to waver, not ever! If there are possibilities or chances of you wavering in your love for someone, then there is the likelihood that your love is not perfect, that you do not love that person perfectly. Remember it’s not about a perfect partner, it’s about a perfect love for a partner.
Lastly but not the least, love casts out fear. Fear has three opponents according to 2 Timothy 1:7- power, love, and sound mind. Is it not true that when you entertain fears about your relationship, you feel unsafe or insecure about your life, like there is something daunting it? Also when you have fears about someone in your relationship with that person, you feel like that thing is taking control over you, even over your whole life? How true these are! So, you never want to have that fear around when you’re in a relationship or when you love someone, they are so… mehn!
So, this is just a little something I wanted to share with you about love in your relationships. Literally, there is nothing to fear about if or when you love someone. Most of the fears we entertain are not real and they can rob us of the joy and happiness that we’re supposed to enjoy from loved ones. Believe you me, I’ve been there and it’s nothing pleasant, when people are showing you love and you’re taking it as treacherous. God bless you.