I’m feeling a bit light-headed today so I thought of writing something worth reading. There are three rings in marriage that one wears. They are the engagement ring, the wedding ring and suffer-ring. We already know the first two so lemme jump straight to the third.
Many couples love to wear the first two rings but detest the last one. When suffering sets in marriage, they look for an easy way out, which is to get a divorce. Just like Job said, “If we have enjoyed good from the Lord, shouldn’t we also endure evil from Him?” (rf. Job 2:10). Some may protest this strongly but can we predict what will happen and wouldn’t happen in marriage?
Suffer-ring is one ring we put on in marriage when the storms set in. There are storms in life and so are they in marriages. When the storms set in, that is the perfect time for you to stand together and not run away. Just like the preacher said, “two are better than one” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12). You are better off as couples to withstand any storm(s) that come your way than when you are single and alone.
So, how many would love/want to wear this last ring of marriage? Let’s read the last scripture before you take any decision. Ruth 1:16-17 reads
And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God:
Where thou diest, will I die, and there will I be buried: the LORD do so to me, and more also, if ought but death part thee and me.
The vow which Ruth made to Naomi was very binding, and could be the source of our present day marriage vows- for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in health and in sickness, etc. Ruth was determined to stay with Naomi no matter what. It wasn’t because of what she had seen in her or what she could gain from her. After all, Ruth had lost her husband and wasn’t willing to lose another, her mother-in-law. Perhaps, the men of Israel were better than the men of Moab and so Ruth clung to Naomi and was not any ready to leave her. We all know the story; things went in favour for Ruth and she had another husband named Boaz, king David’s great grandfather.
When we wear the ring of suffering, that is, when we accept it, we come to the point where it subsides and a new season sets in. At that point, it doesn’t matter how much you lost but how much you will be receiving. Like they say, “no condition is permanent and suffering is just a state”, how you react in such times matters. The best reaction towards it is to embrace it, stand strong through it and then allow it to pass.
My prayer is that as you are planning for your marriage, you will plan for this last ring also. Nothing will set you back when you prepare for the last ring and make room for it. You will stand strong, and tall, when you embrace the opportunity to rise through the storms. God bless you as you set on this endeavour, amen.